March Profile : Zak Ahchay


This month's profile is on Zak Ahchay. Below is a transcript of a recent interview I had with him.

Jon: What is your full name?

Zak: Zak Bain Ahchay

Jon: And what are you doing at Uni?

Zak: IT Bullshit

Jon: Anything else you want to tell me about Uni?

Zak: Yeah its pretty fucking ghetto

Jon: So Zak, whats your most embarassing moment?

Zak: I think everyone knows that one. Too drunk can't remember didn't happen.

Jon: And whats the funniest thing thats happened to you?

Zak: When you said walk and I walked into the glass thing then I broke the window. (In grade 8 I told zak to walk
into a glass window and he did, it smashed and he ended up with bits of glass in his arms)

Jon: What is the drunkest you've ever been, and what happened?

Zak: Umm.. that night Niky's party and I had fruity lexia, drank half of it then spent the rest of the night passing out under cars and throwing up. Apparently I passed out on Erin's crotch. Apparently. I can't remember it.

Jon: What animal are you, physically and mentally?

Zak: Physically, Salmon, mentally a lemur cause I'm all psycho and I like to bite shit.

Jon: Best advice you ever had?

Zak: Eat something so when you get drunk you have something to throw back up.

Jon: What would you do if you were a chick for one day?

Zak: I'd sleep with every guy I knew so when I turned back to a man I could say I slept with you (to everyone). And I could call them fags. But wait, would you be a fag when physically you're a woman but mentally you're a guy? or would you be a slut?

Jon: (after much thinking) No.. I think you would still find girls attractive if mentally you were a guy, so you'd be a lesbian sleeping with guys.

The interview degenerated from about here on. Next month, Sam.